The Gorean Lifestyle as Mainstream Worldview

We all did it... or at least, we knew plenty of people who did. Kids growing up swear that as soon as they’re out on their own, they’ll eat cheeseburgers every day, stay up all night, wear whatever they want, and generally rebel against anything and everything their parents made them do. Many go on to do exactly that... at least for a little while. And then, for most of those, strange things happen... they settle down and straighten up, start eating more healthily, get rid of the hostile attitude, and become exactly the normal, well-socialized members of society they swore they’d never be- not because they’re forced to, but because it’s actually a good way to live and get what you want from your life.

The evolution of mindset from "I don’t want to but I guess I have to" through "I’m not going to and you can’t make me" to the final "I will because it actually does work" is an integral part of the maturation process. And, over the last half-century, this process has been traced time after time in different forms, in every aspect of gender relations in Western culture- the coming of age, not of an individual or even a generation, but of an entire philosophy of human interaction.

In the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s, people in general were acting, in various ways, like teenagers just escaped from their parents’ control. "You can’t make me, I’ll do whatever I want" was the underlying attitude behind all sorts of rebellious, selfish, and shortsighted behaviors. But, time eventually turns all teenagers into grownups... and what do we see in the media?

A Coty perfume ad: "Want him to be more of a man? Try being more of a woman!"

Songs on the radio: "The closer I’m bound in love to you, the closer I am to free" from the Indigo girls, and "I only hope that I won’t disappoint you when I’m down here on my knees" in a Sarah McLachlan song.

Books and television shows about "Mars and Venus", teaching (or rather reminding) us that the genders are not the same, that we cannot deal on the same terms with men and women and expect the same results.

"The Surrendered Wife", another book stating explicitly that both husband and wife will generally be happier if she just gets off his back and trusts a little bit.

A training course for female executives called "Bully Broads", teaching women that they’ll be more successful by being competent women than they will by attempting to act like men.

A reglorification of the art of housewifery, spearheaded by Martha Stewart and a woman calling herself "The Queen of Clean", among others.

And many, many more stories, anywhere you care to look, all telling the same story: "The old ways, the ways people did things for thousands of years... in a lot of ways they really weren’t that bad."

To do what you ought, but only because you’re forced, is the act of a slave... or a child. To refuse to do what you ought, simply because you can, is the act of one who is nothing more than an older child. But to sit back and realize, that all those things that people told you to do, are indeed the right things to do... to have the maturity to recognize that you’ll be happier and more successful if you just do what your parents were telling you all along... that’s the first step into adulthood.

When we see men and women everywhere turning back to traditional roles in relationships, putting aside the freedom-turned-license of the last few decades and returning to the fundamentals of what works... not because they are bound by tradition, or fear being outcast from their family or their society, but because it’s simply a good way to live... perhaps, we as a culture are simply beginning to grow up. It won’t happen all at once, by any means... such growing-up never does. But the signs are everywhere, and there are more every day.

And perhaps this world we live in isn’t as far from Gor as it has sometimes seemed, after all.

Gabriel and kaylee write a monthly column about issues pertaining to the lifestyles of Goreans on Earth. Questions, comments, and suggestions or requests for topics can be addressed to Gabriel@gor-on-earth.com