It has happened to every slave that posts on a Board with regularity (and sometimes to those who post a single time). A Master will find their words to be less than pleasing. A slave panics, she wishes to go find the nearest fur and hide, or beg a Master to remove the post, praying to some deity that the Board will crash...or a hot topic will arise and the post will move down into obsurity. Of course, this never happens. It stays there, glaring at us...reminding us of our failure to be pleasing. siv{OV} was kind enough to recount her experience of composing a post to a Board which a Master found displeasing... and what she learned from the experience. sa`belle

Articulation with Attitude: A Slave's Demise-- by siv{OV}

"Watch your tone, you're not giving a lecture, or disagreeing, simply presenting ideas."

"Yes, Master."

"You are worthless."

"Yes, Master."

"It's not a question of how much you know, it's a question of whether or not the men around you want to hear it, and how they want it presented."

"Yes, Master."

"Do not confuse intelligence with strength or submission."

"Yes, Master.

Chances are you would have found this girl muttering to herself about throwing in the towel the next day upon reading the replies to her post. You may have seen her wandering the halls outside the channels wiping a few tears, licking her wounds. Doesn't it seem some days those two words slaves are allowed to end any conversation with may be all we get an opportunity to articulate when faced with a Master disappointed?

"Yes, Master."

Recent endeavors failing to express intelligently, respectfully have led this girl to wonder if she isn't related to that little puppy in the back of George and Marta's 1963 Chevrolet Impala whose head bobs up and down with the tire rotations...yes, Master...yes, Master....yes, Master, keeping time with a childhood tune of, "The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. The slave with an attitude posting on the Boards goes tumbling down, tumbling down...all through the town." Never ending struggles, Gorean world without end, she walked away vowing never to post her most intimate passions again. She would show them!

"We need to talk siv."

"Yes, Herre."

Now those five words really hurt, the breath catches in the throat, a lump forms as if an apple wedge is caught restricting the airway, no doubts her owner is going to make it very clear his disappointment. All the while adrenalin is pumping the heart into a frenzy, the gastric acids churn and vomit is held in the back of the throat, waiting for the inevitable. A Master is disappointed. No other can make her drop to her knees faster, than a girl's owner. All the while she is trying to keep from crying, trying to have to defend her actions to her owner, justifying, why...A Master is always right, no matter if he is wrong. As Celine sings, "This is getting serious...are you thinking about you or us?"

"Yes, Master."

The process of disappointment a slave goes through is not unlike Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, M.D. stages of grief. According to this model, there are five stages that go in progression through denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. This model has been widely adopted and applied to many other situations where someone suffers a loss or change in social identity. It may not be so extreme to relate disappointing the Gorean Masters and Mistresses to the same stages of grief. Actually she was already in stage three of bargaining by the next morning when her owner approached. Why would a slave want to post with an attitude? Why wouldn't a girl be smart enough to realize it would be tolerated by few, accepted by even less?

"Master, is she slave?" looking seriously into her owner eyes.

"Why do you ask siv?"

"Those are the only words another can say to make her start doubting herself...those words cut through her heart."

It is the beginning of the end, she would move her writings to another board, she was intelligent, articulate and a slave with an attitude. She had worked through denial of having any responsibility in the matter of being misinterpreted, it wasn't her expressed desire that others may not see her post as passionate. She had been angry enough to shed tears over a piece of writing that now made her look like she thought she was equally as strong as a Master would be...not one word of it true, it wasn't what she said! Read again she wanted to scream. She made her own bargain to move on...leave it behind, those who did not care for her style of writing be damned, she would post elsewhere. It was the easy way out...can't argue with a Master, he is always right! That may be the one philosophy of Gor that sticks in the throat of slaves the most, especially those who are stronger and able to present ideas logically and with a flair.

The fourth stage she would describe as a sadness of leaving a favorite doll behind when the family car was miles from home heading for that summer vacation when it was discovered she was missing, parents would not turn back to get. It was a separation from the only Board she knew, submitting her post with others she knew and respected, enjoying the discussions and the views of many in the community. Always with an eye for those posts she felt strongly about, formulating her thoughts to add to the discussion, challenging others to think. She avoided those issues that dealt with the Free, she had no need to respond to them. She enjoyed humor, and subtlety..those hidden meaning behind an otherwise harmless post...many who know her writing saw the sarcasm and the dry wit that bordered on that fine line between being responsible and acting with an attitude. Master especially, would call her on a few, knowing she was pushing a fine edge.

Takes a moment to look around the community, smiling into the eyes of those that know her, nodding her head to those she hasn't met and reaches her hands out to the slaves saying, "To think you may write anyway you wish, freedom of speech and the Bill of Rights...please take another moment of your time to continue with this girl into the final stage, that of acceptance."

Taking responsibility for one's actions is harder to accomplish than working through the first four stages. It depends on attitude. The easiest way to deal or not deal with disappointing those we serve is to run. Simple solution, fast easy to do, no one will bother you, no more pain. But the following is also an option if one chooses to accept her role in the matter.

"Watch your tone, you're not giving a lecture, or disagreeing, simply presenting ideas."

A slave is given the privilege of registering and posting on the Board. It comes with the expressed responsibility that being among the Gorean men and women, slaves will held accountable and in their place amongst the Free. Or a slave is gone! Poof! The moderators and the owners will not tolerate insolence. A warning is an attempt to correct behavior that borders on irresponsibility, look at your attitude girl. In looking, she sees her rights to present her thoughts to the community respectfully, intelligently and the right as a woman to challenge others to think for themselves. Is this wrong? Do men and women in our society, international Goreans coming together fear a slave who can think for herself? Do they truly want only a "Yes, Master." puppy in the rear window to bob their heads?

"You are worthless."

Well, this one was the proverbial straw that broke the kajira's back!

"Thank you for sharing Victoria, now put your head down." We could all live a lifetime without having those words expressed. We are women, many are mothers, wives, students, professionals, business leaders, creative, and civic minded citizens in our offline communities. Online, posting to a community Board that has many members from all walks of life, all intelligence levels, many castes represented, we as slaves are worthless! Fact...accept and go on. The Masters are and will always be right. Or question this as a philosophy that in the books state slaves hold no meaning to the Masters. Yet, we know we have so much to offer and to bring into their lives, some men value their property. If you feel worthless, would it not stand to reason you will serve "worthlessly?"

If we look at another adjective, a slave holds less meaning in the society compared to men and women who are Free, then she would have to agree. But to serve Master or others, if this girl was so adamant that she holds no value in what she offers, then what would be the point of struggling to please? Where is it written that slaves are not proud, not competing to be seen as the best before the men? Where would the inner driving force come from? Learning comes from intrinsic means, behavior can be modified by extrinsic forces...Who would then own the problem for a broken slave? Who in the community would want one?

"It's not a question of how much you know, it's a question of whether or not the men around you want to hear it, and how they want it presented."

Purposefully enticing ire in a post title is extremely dangerous. This one is guilty of this, it is her style, she does it without stopping to think about it. It is double-edge, it is meant to say, "Okay, here goes...ready or not siv{OV} is about to sting...heads up!" Her title stated by a Master was in direct conflict with her status...she contradicted and it was wrong. Acceptance. There is still room for individual writing styles, many are present and blend well. Respectful, purposeful, responsible, nice adjectives to be a slave's guide. If they do not wish to read slave's thoughts, no one is harmed. It is each individual's choice...there are slaves that she will not miss a word they print, there are Masters and Mistresses she follows as if they had their own paper column. Faithfully, reading and studying, always questioning...always learning. Is that the purpose of the Boards?

"Do not confuse intelligence with strength or submission."

Oh dear slaves, those with many years, those with but a few short weeks, this statement applies to us all, whether collared or not, whether young or old, most of us share a higher intellect. What does that do to our feelings, our expression and our passion for living? Is it a strength or a curse we share? The Master's words are the most profound. Now what? Are the wrists bound? Is there a gag to be in her mouth? Does she wear her GPA inked across her forehead? No, it won't be necessary. A slave uses her intellect as a strength to keep her moving forward. There lies the lesson in being held accountable for failing to be pleasing.

Learning that we will stumble and fall, being knocked down by those we have offended, bruised egos mend. There is no place for an attitude of superiority from slaves on Gor, in Gorean channels, in a private Gorean home. Acceptance we are meaningless to some in the community, we are valued by others. Move forward, do not stall out on this. It is Gorean men and women sharing a basic philosophy we are serving. They are unique individuals with a commonality, just as we are as slaves. Our words are a part of our need to serve. Our thoughts shared are a way to reach those in the community for advice, for understanding, but with the only attitude that matters, a need to be pleasing.

A slave may choose to keep her attitude, for a while. She may get away with her wit and wiles for a while. She may post, discuss, serve and for a while, her attitude will remain unscathed, but only for a while. The attitude has to be kept in check...or it is the demise of a slave.

By learning more, reaching higher in her own need to be a part of the community, she wishes all well.

siv{OV}
property of OldViking