Speaking only for tessa; from a slave's point of view, it means to live a life focused on being pleasing. To surrender all society's preconceptions that dictate what genders 'should' be and strive to touch the genesis base from which we were created. For that effort, we are sometimes called obsessive, zealots, elitists and unrealistic. That we not only understand the differences between male and females but joyfully recognize why we are different is, for some, both our curse, and our redeemer.

    A Gorean girl, in tessa's mind, lives joyfully in the complete service to another without giving thought to ask, "what's in it for me?" A girl who actually lives a Gorean lifestyle doesn't have to ask, because the answer it is a part of the very essence that makes her a slave.

    This lifestyle isn't about the individual ways each Master prefers his property to serve him. The ways of Goreans are as diverse as the personalities of those who study them, but Gorean concepts and philosophies for a slave are very simple; she must "be" pleasing. Gor seems to become complex only when those who cannot attain the standards attempt to change them, to make it easier, and amend what is unyielding because the lifestyle is so hard.

    Possibly one of the hardest lesson a slave faces is learning when to speak and when to remain silent. Free speech can develop into a bad habit that must be unlearned and self-controlled. Although Master encourages tessa to ask questions, she knows all conversations with her owner must be stated in pleasing form, else the discussion ceases quickly. This girl loves philosophy discussions with Master. Communication is vital, however, no girl on Master's chain is permitted "freedom of speech." We are allowed "freedom of pleasing speech when and if it pleases Master."

    Like all of us, there are times when tessa sees various "injustices." Her sense of right and wrong is no different from any other normal human being. Were she free, she might very well feel compelled to speak out publicly against such matters. But this girl is not free. In short, tessa believes that there is simply NO slave opinion so important or worthy of note to risk being displeasing in the statement of it. Sometimes, it is a matter of delivery, other times it is a matter of timing, still other times it may just be a matter of sucking it up silently. Learning when to apply each, then, is a valuable tool.

    That isn't to say slaves don't slip up? You bet we do! On more than one occasion tessa has felt Master's finger on her lips and looked up in silence to see a raised eyebrow. This girl learned very quickly not to speak another word from that moment on, until allowed.

     Recently, tessa was blessed with the opportunity to spend ten days with her owner. For a week Master and tessa traveled through the beautiful northern countryside. The remaining three days were spent with Master's and tessa's family. The joy of that time is hard to describe. The education was invaluable. Each evening, when we returned to our lodging, tired from a long day's activities, tessa prepared dinner, served drink, massaged tired feet and calves, drew a bath, fixed snacks, set out clothes, picked up socks, fetched slippers and entertained Master with pleasing conversation. In short, this girl worked like a ……<big smile here>…… slave. Although it was not the first time tessa has served her owner, offline, it was the longest period she has been with him. During that week, tessa learned that for the girls of Master's chain, there are NO time outs, NO allee-in-for-frees, no short cuts, no kind and gentle Gor, and in that strict structure, there was unbelievable freedom. This girl was treated as what she is, no more, no less. She was not equated to a wife or free companion. In tessa's case, Master has a wonderful Free Companion who is his soul mate. She was not cared for like a girlfriend. Master demands more from tessa than a man would of a relationship within that genre. Her simple purpose was to please, and not for one moment did tessa forget that very basic fact. She would not have been allowed to.

    It has been said that the process of becoming slave is like peeling an onion. There are times when a we feel the goal is close, other times when it alludes our grasp. But to learn to live for the pleasure and in service of those who are free, with no "but what ifs" makes life in this lifestyle much easier.

    tessa revels in the richness of her full and blessed life when, with a word or smile, a girl knows her efforts have been successful. When she errs she makes whatever changes necessary to amend the errant behavior. She takes a deep breath and sets out again toward renewed goals, recognizing that she is an Earth girl who made the choice to live the philosophies set forth in 25 novels, knowing she will make mistakes along the way. She remember as long as she doesn't choose to fail, she will remain a girl of some worth to her owner.

    In closing, this girl would like to speak on failure. Master defines failure as "willful disobedience;" when a girl lets her emotions rule her actions. Failure makes no allowances for the heat of a moment, or raging hormones. Failure is not an error, it is an action made that is knowingly displeasing, and it has no excuse. When a girl fails, she knows she fails. There is no, "But Master, this girl couldn't help it" rule for Gorean girls, and a successful girl learns quickly the necessity of self control. Often Master will look into the eyes of each of his girls and simply say, "Don't fail." The reminder is sobering, for Master teaches that once a girl fails, she becomes less.

    Master Bear's pleasure is that his girls BE pleasing 24/7. That means not trying to find the quick, easy route. It means to recognize that Gor is truly hard and demands sacrifices of all who walk its path. It means to accept that slavery really means slavery, i.e. W O R K, physically, emotionally and spiritually and understanding the totality this lifestyle demands. It is knowing when and how to speak and when (and how) to remain still, recognizing that slaves' thoughts and views are only as important as the free deem them to be. It is using all a girl's past experiences, wonderful talents and great strengths to focus on that one purpose.

    In the last ten days, tessa had the chance to reflect over the last two and a half years since that rainy Sunday when she walked into a Tavern on Dalnet called Silk & Steel. She thought a lot about the changes she has made and those that have been made to her. She remembers gratefully the many who have had profound influence on her path. She is constantly reminded of how blessed she is to have found this community.

    We hear so much of the pitfalls of our lifestyle, and there ARE truly many. tessa has watched well-meaning girls fail, and dishonest people attempt to change the community with greed and weakness. None of that changes, simply because a slavegirl was able to spend ten glorious days with her Master. But, today being Gorean is beautiful, and being slave is filled with joyful pleasure. Today, to have touched the total freedom of the modality of slavery is magnificent, and gives tessa cause to rejoice in her life's choices and the decision of her master to own her. Today tessa will wrap herself up in unshakable happiness, because THAT's what's in it for her.