Gypsy

In all the treatment of living by the Gorean philosophy as an "adult alternative lifestyle", and all the concern about integrating our strange, unusual beliefs and activities into the "normal" world around us, it is easy to overlook the fact that the natural order and a way of living based on that order have been a part of human life for thousands of years, have been the foundation of most of humanity’s history... and are, indeed, still taken for granted and expressed in everyday life in some parts of the world we live in today.

Back in the villages of a certain area of Eastern Europe, where daily life has changed little in the last two hundred years, a mode of living which would be quite comfortable to a transplantee from the planet Gor is still practiced. Moreover, when these men and women make their way to the new world, they bring with them all of their traditions and beliefs, their rich culture, and their politically most incorrect way of living, and continue to live their rather Gorean-looking lives right here in the U S of A.

I had an opportunity this month to interview a woman of this culture who also is familiar with online Gor, and we discussed such matters as slavery, mastery, and general living. Her goulash, it should be noted, is not to be missed. Following are some excerpts from that conversation:

Gabriel: Let’s start with asking how you found online Gor in the first place.

Eterna smiles softly...

Eterna: Well, one night, I was exploring the computer... it was the second day I found a chat relay system... and I popped in, talked to a few people... and met this slave named kefira.... she was leaving to go to Gor. She explained it, and it rung something in me, because of the familiarity of it.

Gabriel nods, listening... familiar how?

Eterna: in the way women were submissive: men being Masters, the natural order... that being the same case in our culture.

Eterna: I was curious, and at first also frightened...

Eterna: the first day, I just sat, observed... didnt talk at all.

Eterna: the second day, I thanked the room owner for allowing me to visit... and to repay him, I danced, online.

Eterna: I was shocked at the pm’s I received from Masters, asking if I would teach their girls to dance.

(Note that Eterna is a singer by trade, and frequently incorporates her culture’s dances into her performances.)

Eterna: at one time my household had 8 girls...

Gabriel: You say "girls"... basically slaves? What is their life like?

Eterna: they have a wonderful life... they are clothed nicely, their needs taken care of, as well as their families

Eterna: and they are genuine in being pleasing... it is not something they had to learn to be, it was the way they were raised.

kaylee: are they all sexual slaves, or mostly other functions, Mistress?

Eterna: sexuality has some play....not as rampant as Gor....and also depending on the situation....

Eterna: for instance, if the Man is not married, he has the girls at his disposal... but it doesnt distract from what they do.

Eterna: Now, if he is married... he still has that right to take them sexually if he chooses, but most likely, if he loves his wife, then he abstains from that.

Gabriel: How are these girls acquired? Does money change hands, or does one family serve another through the generations? What if one man wants another’s slave, do exchanges take place?

Eterna: usually family... but both can actually happen. Say if a need arises and they come to a Master with their daughter because they cannot keep her...

Eterna: a Master might decide to help: not because of need... but to help.

Eterna: do you follow?

Gabriel nods... so it’s more of a benefactor position, than a buyer.

Eterna: yes. Now if someone comes along....and he sees someone he would like to aquire, he will talk to the owner and see if he may pay or barter... but that is up to the owner.

Gabriel: And all this happens, not just back in the old country, but here in the US.

Eterna: well here in the US it’s not done openly....

Eterna: more than likely they are brought back from overseas, with the arrangments already made.

Eterna: children who grow up here learn different ways, so that when they come of age... they are not so much willing to live a total life like those before them.

Eterna: we didn’t have choices... they now do. I see the the changes in the past 20 years.

Gabriel: Are any of these new ones embracing the old ways, the dependent life, or are they mostly choosing to go their own way?

Eterna: the girls will still be submissive, and know how to run a household... but now it is for their own home. They dont want to incorporate all the old ways.

Eterna: now where were we?

Eterna (laughs)

Gabriel: You were saying how the women of your culture, even the free ones, were more feminine than most American women

Eterna: yes, very much so. American women are turning into men- more dominant... self reliant, loud, opinionated. It’s to a point....excuse the way I put this... American woman now have vibrators: they don’t feel they need a man at all... yet inside they grow bitter. Look at the way most are... their man says, hon I’m going out with the guys... right away an argument insues. Our women will smile and say, alright, have fun... and then prepare herself for when he comes home, not argue about the time he comes or why he is late. Unfortunately, there are instances where it isn’t always smooth if a woman finds herself with a man who is abusive... thankfully that does not run rampant, but there are instances where it does and it is tolerated because it is his own household. She is the one who suffers in silence because it IS a man’s world in our culture.

Eterna: our men are very secure in themselves. They dont try to be men.... they just are. They know when they say stop, or enough, or that’s the final way... thats the way it will be. Final.

Eterna: He takes pride in that girl... knows her worth, and knows she is his... and it pleases him to know that she is his and viewed as a wonderful asset. It makes him stand proud, but you will never see a Man sit there and make a fool of himself with a girl or cater to her... he is not going to be cooing to her or feeding her morsels.

Eterna: in private yes... in public no.

Gabriel (chuckles)

Eterna: nor would he sit next to his woman and let a slave act inappropriate in front of her... but our girls know this. She will treat his woman with love and respect... and the girl knows she will recieve the same back.

Gabriel: So there’s no conflict between the slaves and the free, because each knows her place.

Eterna: yes... exactly. There is no jealousy... if there is, then the man failed. He failed because he did not address and handle things the correct way, and allowed it to come forth... if a Man has a Companion, then it is his responsibility to make sure she knows and feels she is above all others. A true man is not afraid of that commitment because he knows the worth of her, he doesn’t feel his masculinity is in question if he puts his woman in front of others... if anything it makes him more of a man, more sought after because things are under his control, instead of brushing it away and being lazy... he controlled it. A woman who knows that and feels secure in him... would she have need to doubt or be jealous or afraid about stepping on toes? The answer is no, and she will feel secure in running her household, and knowing that the order she keeps is for his best interest and pleasure.

Eterna: a woman does not fear a girl taking away her man, nor does a girl fear the woman because of jealousy... a girl will fear only if she tries to create trouble and the man allows it- her fear will be that she is cast aside. And if she is.....do you think another household would bring her in?

Gabriel: So the whole community enforces good behavior.

Eterna: yes, very much so- it is in all of their best interest. Why would a woman bring a girl into her home knowing she is a upstart, and creates turmoil in her home... is that girl really trying to be pleasing? Or trying to step up? Is it worth the trouble to find out?

Gabriel: So, what about down the road for these girls? Do they get married, have children, get "promoted" out of service? Assuming she keeps her nose clean and doesn’t end up on the street =)

Eterna: yes, very much so... my own girl fell in love with a friend, so when he asked me for her... who am I to stand in the way of love? (smiling) I hated seeing her go.

Gabriel: is that the rule or the exception?

Eterna: if the girls are good, they will be rewarded... I have never seen any treated with spite. Some can have husbands and still serve, depending on the status of their husband... they just serve during the day, and go home in the evening.

Eterna: when the time comes for children... depending on where they are at, they might be raised as there mother was, to serve, but here in the States is not so much the case.

Gabriel: That’s interesting... is there ever a conflict between the husband and the man she serves, or does each feel comfortable with the other?

Eterna: nay....because our men will not be intimate with another’s woman. She may still serve, and her husband knows this...

Gabriel: ...so respect and just common sense go a long way.

Eterna: honor is paramount, yes.

Gabriel: So how does Gor fit in with all this?

Eterna: the sad thing to me is... in the past 5 years of being online, I can only think of a limited few who I could pluck offline and set them down in a r/l setting and they would blend in as if they were there all along. I see too many self-proclaimed Masters who go from "I would never cater to a slave" to feeding them morsels, giggling, talking them into collars, almost as if begging them to let them Master her... in actuality his masculinity vanishes the first time he has to tell her why she would be happy at his feet. Who then is Mastering who? I have yet to see one of our Men explain why... he looks at her, she knows. There is no begging, there is no questions asked... she sees him, his bearing, his presence, his mannerisms, listens to his words... and begs HIM, not the other way around. And yet I can place a man from my culture and set him anywhere and know he will not only blend in, but stand out, in a good way. His presence will draw glances, unspoken words heard...

Eterna: Once the fantasy of non-stop 24/7 sexuality and cyberness is gone... and Gor is looked at as a way of living a lifestyle, and all that it entails: cooking, cleaning, family, needs, sexuality, et cetera, et cetera... that is the fullfillment which was the basis of the fantasy to begin with. Maybe then we would see the real Men, the real Masters, the real free women... and the real slaves... instead of people who cannot live up to or be the overblown personas they have created just for instant sexual gratification, which is fleeting at best and leaves emptiness that grows bigger and wider. Maybe then there would be a real "Gorean Community" and no longer just a series of "Science Fiction Fantasy" books... maybe.

Gabriel: Are your people happy?

Eterna: yes... listen to our music, read our words, our poems, look at our dances, our feasts. Dont get me wrong, at times things aren’t the way they should be, but nothing in this world is perfection. I myself feel, I wouldnt want to trade shoes with any other than what I am... I take pride in myself, my heritage, my history... that I know how to please, and give pleasure in all I do... that first and foremost... I am a woman. And I revel in it, not ashamed of it... maybe that’s why people notice and say, Eterna, you are so different... I say no, I’m just a woman.

Gabriel: (smiling) Seems so simple, no?

Eterna: very simple to me... but as I said: I live it.

Gabriel and kaylee write a monthly column about issues pertaining to the lifestyles of Goreans on Earth. Questions, comments, and suggestions or requests for topics can be addressed to Gabriel@gor-on-earth.com