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“Little Vulo” by kaylee{G} One night, kaylee was kneeling before a man who often allowed her to engage him in discussions. At the close of this one, he closed it by calling her a “little vulo” and chucking her gently under the chin. At her look of confusion (which was about the same time kaylee was asking herself “Wha-at? did he call kaylee a .. little chicken??”), he explained why he used the term. He explained that when a baby chick first pecks its way out of the shell, standing on wobbly feet and gazing around at the new world, there is a sense of vulnerability that he sometimes sees in slaves. Living vulnerably is something kaylee’s grown accustomed to within her service to the man who owns her. There are times when she is so used to it, that it doesn’t seem to stand out. It is just an everyday part of how she lives. There are other times when the sense of being so vulnerable, naked and emotionally exposed is so overwhelming that it seems like somehow everyone around her would notice it... that it screams “slave” even as she moves through her normal every day to day life. There are times when something in particular gives her the heightened sense of vulnerability: when her head was first shaved by the man she serves, or when he marked her with a tattoo, when she is clad in nothing but his steel. But it is also something that she is aware of when she is very focused on her service- the more focused, the more aware she is of it. When she first began to explore her nature, she didn’t realize how many protective walls she had built around her. The trouble was, these shields prevented anyone getting close to her. In many ways, she thought that it would prevent her from getting hurt. That kind of “walling off” was not acceptable to the man who now owns her, and he began to peel back those layers to reveal the softer, more tender side of kaylee. The idea of someone being so close to her was not something she was used to, and the sheer vulnerability she felt was something she resisted at times. Until she realized that she does not have the luxury of hiding behind a shield. And so she’s learned to let go. It’s been a challenge to learn to accept being more emotionally vulnerable- exposing herself to him also leaves her more open to others. While she feared letting go of some of her layers would make her more vulnerable to pain, it has allowed her to look beyond the exterior shell and see what she truly is, at her core. kaylee doesn’t want those layers and layers back... they kept her hidden from the world and what she craves most, is to be available in all ways to the man who owns her. Tennyson once wrote: “The shell must break before the bird can fly.’ In letting go of her own shell... this little vulo has found her own wobbly feet growing surer along this path he’s chosen for her. Until next month, she wishes you well. kaylee has been the household property of Gabriel for over five years, and together they have shared their passion for writing on his website: www.gor-on-earth.com. Future topics, suggestions, feedback, and questions are always welcome. kaylee can be contacted at: kaylee@gor-on-earth.com |
