Part III – Benefits and Problems

Last month we took a deeper look at setting up a community. This month, I thought I’d turn to the benefits and some of the inherent problems, plus a slight sidetrack.

Perhaps the biggest benefit initially is the reinforcement of our views that meeting with others gives a chance to discuss our philosophy, to reaffirm our beliefs. Any who have held their beliefs since pre-online days will know the isolation of feeling you’re the only one with these thoughts, who follows this lifestyle. Also, it is not always easy to evaluate ones own thoughts critically, to be able to look inside and say with certainty "I am Gorean". By meeting with others, this judgement is reinforced. If men I recognize as Gorean also recognize those qualities in me, then we’re off to a good start.

In the same vein, the slaves benefit from this reinforcement, putting them in an environment where their slavery is accepted, where they will be seen as slaves by the men, and take reinforcement from the other girls.

Later in the development of the community, mutual support also comes into play. Now, depending on how the community has been set up, this can range from the moral support of a friend in troubled time, to more tangible support. It’s something that was mentioned last month, but is probably worth restating, since while this is a major benefit, it can also be a major problem is not thought through from the beginning. If we assume that the community is going to offer mutual help, then what level will this take? Will children be looked after if required? What happens to slaves if anything happens to her owner? Will the community look after people in times of distress? All these considerations need to be looked at, and addressed so that new members know their responsibilities beforehand.

If the base of the community is solid, expansion should be relatively painless. Newcomers can be evaluated, and perhaps even newcomers can be accepted and educated. This can, of course, present its own problems, since any newcomer could potentially cause dissent once established, and the ones needing educating may show later to not fit in. One interesting side benefit of this, though, is the larger the community, the larger the skills base you can draw from. For instance, need some help with plumbing? Perhaps you’ve got a plumber in the group. This obviously isn’t a prerequisite, but it does give an additional benefit.

So what of the problems? Be prepared for personality clashes. You’re dealing with strong-minded people here. If you have set up rules/oaths, you should have set them up in such a way that they allow freedom of expression.

Secondly, you WILL come across people wanting to join who you feel are either not Gorean, or do not fit in with the community at that time, for whatever reason. If you’ve thought about the joining mechanism, then this shouldn’t be a problem, but avoid wishful thinking; i.e. hoping someone you personally like will with help be able to measure up. Maybe they will, but you need to take an unbiased critical look.

Other problems will naturally present themselves along the way. For instance, what do you do with a slave who has just been freed and who has children (not by her master) to support? Many of these can of course be more easily handled with a little forethought at the early stages of the community.

So on to the sidetrack. I’m writing this while looking to the rear of my house, where one of the windows is boarded up; the results of a burglary yesterday. Now, I only bring this up, because one of my neighbors heard the people breaking in and called the police. They were in time to make an arrest as the thieves left. It’s this mans acts that are important here though. We live in a society where most people prefer to isolate themselves, where giving aid is shunned, where making the effort for the community is set aside. All too often, we forget the obligations living in a community imposes on us. It is this lesson I think we should focus on as we discuss communities – obligations and responsibilities.

One final thought. I’ve tried through these articles to give some thoughts on communities, but the main, underlying message is this – You have to do the work yourself. No one else can do it for you. Understand the philosophy, find people you trust. If you have this, then the rest will follow.

This is the last article I’d planned in this series, however, if any more thoughts occur over the next month, then I will continue.

As always, if anyone has comments, additional thoughts or questions, send them to charon@styx55.freeserve.co.uk

I wish you well

Charon