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You might be a tarn-neck if ...
By Hersius
You might be a tarn-neck if:
- Your huge silver buckle from Thentis is custom-engraved
with words saying something about no one being able to take
your short sword away from you unless they pry it from your
cold, dead fingers.
- You write "Caste of Paga Drinkers" on your tunic ... and
you honestly think it's funny.
- Your kettle-and-mat girl spends more time polishing your
great bow than she does polishing your, well, you know.
- You are a Builder from Ti and would mess your pants if
you ever saw a real outlaw but you buy drinking bowls that
say "Arian Warrior by birth, Outlaw by the grace of the
Priest-Kings."
- You don't need to leave your hut to ask a companionship
blessing of the father of your intended Free Companion.
- You have a clear choice between spending the afternoon
having sex with your kettle-and-mat girl or going to the
tarn races, and you choose to have sex with your
kettle-and-mat girl at the tarn races.
- You can remember every move made in the last
championship kaissa match but cannot seem to remember to pay
your tab at the kalda tavern.
- You once shot your foot cleaning your crossbow.
- You and your best buddy took the hunting sleens and your
crossbows and a generous supply of ka-la-na wine and went
hunting ... only to have to come back to the village a
couple of ahn later for more hunting sleens.
- You really believe that the PKs are fans of the Orange
tarn racing faction because there can be no other reason for
the sunsets being orange.
- Your favorite racing faction, the Greens, never win, so
you spend three days calculating the odds before the big
race, but when it comes time to place your bet and receive
your ceramic token, you blurt out, "Go Big Greens" and
happily blow it all for the tenth year in a row.
- You think that Ko-ro-ba is a barbarian alcohol drink.
- Your spare wagon is out back on dungblocks with the
wheels off
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