Greetings Masters and Mistresses,
greetings slaves,
One hopes you enjoy this month’s essay, and beg that all take it in the humorous light that it is meant.
A happy spring to all,
Wishing all well,
kessia{Sage}

The word of the day is ....... issues.

OK, it is time. Slaves, brace yourselves, because one is going to de-classify the Manhattan Project of slavery: Issues. Yes, kessia realizes that most would rather admit to public nose picking than own up to being a member of ’issues anonymous’, but it really is time to just get it all out there in the open. High time we admit to the rules to which we hold each other and enter the ’getting honest’ phase of our issue recovery. Though we all are familiar with the rules, a girl is, for the first time in kajira history, going to document them, for all to enjoy.

1. It is better to have a raging case of scabies or contact dermatitis than to be a slave with issues so, do not have them.
     a. If you do have issues, deny them for as long as you possibly can. If necessary, remind yourself continually that Cleopatra need not be the only queen of denial. If you have trouble remembering, beg the free to change your name to cleo or nefertiti (if you are feeling somewhat exotic).
      b. It is better to have a problem, a situation or even take umbrage with something as long as you do not have an issue with it. Situations CHANGE. If it is a bit bigger than a situation, then maybe it is a problem. Problems are ok, you can SOLVE those. If all else fails, it is probably better to fall back onto plain old bluster and take umbrage with the thing rather than let it be an issue.
     c. If you persist in having an issue, try to turn it into a problem as quickly as you can but never take umbrage with someone else’s problem with your issue. If you have a problem with someone else’s issue, do not let it become an issue for you. Instead, try to change it to a situational thing, or just have a problem with it. If you have to, go ahead and take umbrage with the issue, just as long as you understand slaves are not entitled to righteous ire.
2. No slave, owned or unowned should take umbrage with anything. And if you take umbrage, you had better put it back before you get caught with it.
     a. The only possible reason to take umbrage with something and risk punishment is to prevent that something from becoming an issue.
     b. If you do take umbrage with something, it had better not have anything to do with your inner child.
3. Unowned slaves are not allowed to have issues or problems. If you are not owned, you have not been permitted to fully explore yourself yet, so you have nothing to get upset about. Unowned slaves may, however, have the occasional situation. A problem or two, while frowned upon, is also allowed but only if the problem has to do with things other than your slavery.
4. Owned slaves are not allowed to have issues either. If you’re owned, you are under the hand of a man, so you have nothing to be upset about. However, owned slaves are do have more leeway with situations and problems. It is accepted that owned girls will have situations and problems (the accepted magnitude is a function of time spent with the owner) simply because they are in a collar, which apparently chafes one’s inner child.

The girls reading this are likely sitting in unbelieving horror, stunned that kessia has not only listed these hidden female rules but has also ADMITTED that issues exist. It would be different if one had been asked or told to disclose everything she knew about slaves and issues. Obviously then kessia would have had to spit out all of the truth. But to volunteer it? Probably one will have to beg for a body guard.

So, the secret is out. One has shattered the silence surrounding the having of issues. The question remains, why is it so important that we not have issues?

Easy answer: The girls in the books didn’t.

They had problems, sure. But there wasn’t an issue in sight. Of course, that is probably because the books were written before the the whole touchy-feely, Dr. Feelgood ’i’m ok, you’re ok’, explore your issues and childhood mentality took hold in the 90’s. They didn’t have to fight their society either. So there. Ha ha on you Ute, if you lived here you’d have issues too.

Personally, kessia thinks the issue with issues is the word itself. It’s one of those over used, over burdened right to death with psychological meaning words that now seems to have a life of its own.

As an example:
Much to her chagrin, one recently calmly stated that she had ’issues’ when she was asked by her owner why she was upset. One watched the "oh God, it is going to be a long, long night" look descend over her owner’s face. The mantle of patient tolerance settled over his shoulders as he reached for his coffee and braced himself for the torrent of of tearful explanation that was sure to follow.
On another occasion, one said she had a problem and she would love a chance to just VENT, if it would suit him. Looking amused, he leaned back, kicked up his feet and nodded permission for the tearful ranting to now begin.

The content of the two teary episodes was essentially the same. The difference was assigning that WORD to the tearful rant. Needing to vent brings to mind the old joke ’why does a female have to complain? So she won’t EXPLODE!’. Having an issue brings to mind this morphing, globalizing problem that won’t ever really go away and will have to be dealt with over and over again. Well adjusted slaves occasionally need to vent, psycho-sluts have issues.

So, there it is. Perhaps the next time this girl feels that special feeling in her chest that indicates she needs to talk about whatever thing is bothering her, she will turn to her owner and beg permission to whine, complain and cry, thus escaping the dreaded issue monster and maybe amusing her owner in the process. Will it work? A girl will let you know...........in another issue.