By kaylee{G}

Autonomy

The idea that bothered kaylee the most when she first came across the idea of living as a slave, was being unsure as to how much self and autonomy she would surrender. Could she lose the ability to be a whole person, somehow? Could surrendering her independence only leave her damaged or helpless when she was released? As someone who valued her self sufficiency and worked very hard to never rely on anyone else... the idea of letting that go was troublesome. She wondered fearfully if a slave might become something of a marionette- never moving on her own initiative, but completely dependent on the puppet master. Yet, over time as she focused on the reality of serving her owner, that question seemed to be less important to her than what developed as her actual service to him.

It is one thing to retain some sense of autonomy when she was not owned yet, and serving him long distance. When she became his household property that line became blurred. kaylee's not sure if she was even aware of how much independence she was relinquishing until her owner's work required him to be in the Middle East during a time of high tensions. The very real idea that something could happen to him, and her thoughts about life without serving him really opened up her eyes. It was surprising to realize she was no longer independent, particularly since she had always valued independence and saw it as a sign of strength. It was more surprising still to realize that she did not feel weaker even though she was no longer completely autonomous.

One can break down autonomy into two parts: authority and volition. In a Master/slave relationship, the owner has complete authority. She cannot imagine a situation where he would not be the final authority. But every owner will have his or her own ideas on how much volition they want a slave to retain. The fact that he has absolute authority doesn't necessarily mean that he will always choose to exercise it. Some may prefer giving broad instructions and allowing the slave enough decision making power to determine how to best serve within those guidelines. Others may prefer to give specific, very detailed commands and expect absolute compliance and flawless execution. Probably, for most, reality lies somewhere between the two: general commands in those areas where the owner doesn't have the interest or time to give more particular instruction, while a few specific areas of interest are regulated in greater detail.

There can often be the misconception that by surrendering one's autonomy, somehow the person will cease to remember enough life skills to be self sufficient. While that extremity may be true in very rare occurances, kaylee's own experiences and speaking with other slaves indicate it is not true for all; someone who was healthy and competent before her enslavement will almost certainly remain so afterwards. Surrendering one's independence doesn't necessarily mean she will be micro-managed, unless that is what the owner wishes to do. It does not free her from responsibilities or being held accountable for her actions. Serving someone doesn't mean that she is exempt from making choices or decisions, whether it is how best to accomplish his commands or selecting what words she uses to communicate with her owner.

Being a slave means your will is controlled- it does not mean it is destroyed. A soldier, a nun, a devoted butler, all give up freedoms as they enter into service. But the good of that service is a fair price for the freedom lost; if free will is lost, it does not mean that the ability to serve with intelligence and with joy goes with it. While relinquishing a sense of self and autonomy is not a desired goal for every owner- for those who desire it and own property which is suited for that type of service- those goals can be accomplished in a way that is healthy and fulfilling for both owner and owned.

Ultimately, each slave will flourish under the conditions which are right for her. It is as individual as each relationship, and as unique as the two involved. Whether that is with a long leash or a short one... whether it is as a proactive slave or as a reactive one, or a combination of the two... there is a place for each of us to discover serenity in service.

Until next month, she wishes you well.
-kaylee{G}

kaylee has been the household property of Gabriel for nearly five years, and together they have shared their passion for writing on his website: www.gor-on-earth.com. Future topics, suggestions, feedback, and questions are always welcome. kaylee can be contacted at: kaylee@gor-on-earth.com