Greetings Masters and Mistresses,
greetings slaves,
One submits this letter her Master told her to write, and hopes it is found pleasing.
Wishing all most well,
kessia{Sage}

Dear Master,

You asked kessia to tell you the difference between spending $80,000 as your wife and spending the same amount as your slave. Begging indulgence, one thinks it goes deeper than her being allowed to affix your signature to mortgage papers in your absence.

Looking over the details of life in the past few years, so many things look the same. When you are away, one takes care of business, acting as your agent in all matters as she has every other time. One still cares for the house, one still takes care of the bills and details, is "mommy", speaks as a wife when in the company of neighbors and associates. This sameness is deceptive: Like the rock that appears flat until you try to pick it up and find it is buried in four feet of dirt. Digging past the surface appearance of marriage, one finds that the differences in being wife and slave are in her perspective and the subtle new reality that has woven its way through our lives.

A girl used to staunchly insist that she was not afraid of you, and she always knew what you would do in any given situation. Not any more. Part of the reality that kessia has had to accept is that she does not know how you will react all the time, and with that has come a dose of uncertainty and fear. Is it bad? A girl does not think so. That knife edge of fear is quite often all it takes to make a girl reconsider an outbreak of temper, and adds a deliberation to many of her actions. In the matter of the house purchase, it did complicate things since kessia was both reluctant to project your views and doubtful of her ability to do so.

One used to see you as a life partner, her equal in all things. Obviously, this is not the case any more, and it has changed more than our relative social positions in the house. One is now answerable to higher authority, and must consider what "the Boss" will think and say before she makes any decisions. A girl used to consider your feelings, but it was more with a "yeah, well, what is he gonna do if he doesn’t like it?" attitude that she forced on herself.

There it is, the biggest of the shifts. It used to be that kessia fought against her desire to do what you wanted, what you liked because she thought that was what she was supposed to do. That fight cost a great deal of energy, a great deal of self-deception, and outright denial to many of her friends and family. One used to be ashamed of wanting to see you sit back and sigh blissfully at being home. One used to feel defensive when other women would ask why she works so hard to please you...now she simply says, "Because it is my job, it is what I am good at and what I want to do."

In a recent discussion with another Master, kessia asked about skill and was told that the greatest skill a slave can develop is an awareness of her place. One believes it is more than chanting "One is a slave One is a slave One is a slave" over and over again. The skill lies in being not only aware that one is so very NOT at the top of the food chain, but in feeling comfortable with that knowledge, and comfortable with the idea that everything, absolutely everything is a privilege. From sock washing to signing your name; it is all a privilege. Granted, one does not feel quite as privileged when she is standing over a mess of socks that have sat in a sea bag for ten days, but the essence is the same.

Choosing a house and signing your name to legal documents as your wife would have been easy. It would have required fewer questions, because a girl would not have wanted the level of thoroughness that you like best. It would have required less deliberate thought, since she would have forced herself to have a blind attitude of self-righteousness in being made to move ’her’ house before she was ready. It would have required less focus on your needs, and more defensive feelings on kessia’s part.

Choosing a house and signing your name to legal documents as your slave was hard. One asked about five million questions of the lender, the agent, the attorney and anyone else she could find. One made notes, and made sure they were organized and accessible at any time. When looking at houses, one tried to look with your eyes....the ones that can spot a flaw at 200 yards. One thought carefully about how much time you would have to spend on repairs and maintenance, about what you liked in other houses we had seen, about how you prioritized the requirements you had for a house. No question, this was much harder to do as a slave.

A girl has realized though, sitting here and writing this to you, that being accepted by you as your property has forced kessia to do something that she had failed to do as a child, a woman, or as a wife: Work to the absolute balls to the wall limit of her abilities and her potential without being allowed the safety net of quitting or failing.

Your girl thanks you.
i love you Sage.
Yours